For Days When Your '98 Toyota Corolla is Nowhere Near Good Enough

I recently had an experience which I shall refrain from expounding upon here... It will suffice to say that the feelings the experience stirred in me were a sound mix between frustratedly revengeful, and haughtily daydreamy. Not a good place to be, my friends. As I walked out to my car in such a state, I could not help but feel acutely aware that neither my attire nor my car were suited to the occasion.
It was one of those moments where you wish... no, it was more than a wish.... it was like a deep-down starvation for some Yves St. Laurent coat that may or may not even exist (keeping in mind that all of this is in my head, so whether or not Yves St. Laurent makes a coat like the one I'm imaging is beside the point) and a pair of Louis Vuitton sunglasses, equally as potentially non-existent. It was one of those moments where I felt like I should be climbing into some brand new Porsche Carrera GT (Ok... I just googled "Most expensive Cars in the World" and this was Number 10. It was the prettiest on the list.) being careful not to chip the paint with the heels of my black stiletto Gucci boots, looking in the rear-view mirror to reapply my H. Couture Beauty lipstick from its diamond studded 18 kt. gold plated tube, and then pealing out of the parking lot, letting the smoke from my tires clear just long enough for anyone left behind to be able to read the license-plate frame engraved with the words, "Don't hate me because I'm pretty. Hate me because your boyfriend thinks I'm pretty."
Alas! the moment did not quite play out like it did in my head. In fact, the most poignant memory in this whole little fantasy was an acute awareness that the crunch in the rear bumper of my '98 Corolla did not fit into the moment very well.
Either that, or it made it all the better. Even in retrospect, it's hard to say.

p.s. The car actually belongs to my parents, not to me, and the crunch was there long before the car came into my family. I am grateful for it... and my new red sweater from Kohls, which I actually was wearing at the time.